New Beginnings…
I’ve started this site to bring awareness to my own art and what I do with my life. I have always struggled with my own self worth and am on a journey to finally take care myself and those closest to me. I grew up with a narcissistic mother and did not have a stable home life. I spend my adult life trying to be everything she wasn’t and make sure that I give my kids the best life I can. Times are hard and I spend a great deal of my time advocating for my girls. There are things that are financially out of our reach but I don’t intend to let that stop me from trying. Creating this fundraiser is the next step to providing them a better life.
I was a single mom of one when I met my ex-husband. We lived in my tiny one bedroom apartment and I eventually became pregnant. There were many signs that our relationship had problems, but I wanted a nuclear family and he wanted children and a wife. The good things don’t stick in my memory as well as the bad things. I think that is what living through trauma does to you. I remember wanting things to work more then them working. Being a stay at home mom to a toddler and twin infants while your husband works all the time is hard and society is ruthless. The expectation of motherhood is overwhelming and without support it can make or break you. I have always had to keep my own family at arms length because whenever I trust to much it ends up screwing me over in the end. I learned the hard way and after couples therapy, mediation, three years of being divorced and back and forth in court, I ended up with full custody of all three of my children. I have had to defend their rights and quality of life on my own for the last nine years, which makes me a qualified expert on these kids.
Yesterday was a follow up IEP(Individualized Education Plan) meeting to discuss the results of their Functional Behavioral Analysis results. I have been requesting a 1:1 aid for both my girls in the classroom since last year. My daughters both have SIB’s(self injurious behavior) which can prevent them from working with others in a classroom setting and can cause disruptions to their peers. My girls are severely on the spectrum and work best with a single person working with them directly. Overall the school system wants to promote independence and this is a reason not to provide such an aid for risk of dependency on a singular person. However the bottom line is if these girls can’t move past their behaviors then they will not be able to access the education being provided to them. Beginning first thing this year I requested a meeting for their assessments to start and it was decided to do the FBA first. The results were as expected that these girls would greatly benefit from a 1:1 and we should get someone on the team to facilitate that in the classroom. I was told that finding someone reliable to hire has been difficult in the school system which I believe was pretty inappropriate considering that I’m the parent and that is not part of my responsibility. It IS the school systems legal responsibility to provide my child with a quality education.
The girls will get updated Behavior Intervention Plans and then we will proceed with getting the classroom an aid. I seriously hope this isn’t another thing I have to spend all year fighting for. Kids grow, fast, and special needs kids need as much intervention early as they can get. It is a shame we live in a society that does not value all children equally. Yes, my children need more help in some areas then other kids. Does that mean they don’t deserve to have the best chance they can have? I’ll be keeping this blog to discuss past and future projects and to keep periodic updates on the twins progress. If you read this, thank you for your time.
